CRACKER JAM
Too white to funk
Too stiff to dance

BLOOD CONE
Ice chips and blood drips
A fucking blood cone

PRESIDENTS' DAY HOTDOG
No tax on your one dollar dog

GRINDCORE STAGE SEIZURES
Like a fish out of water
I wish it were your last fucking breath

ANOTHER SPECIES' FECES
Who owns who?
Following a dog
Picking up his shit

FROM THE KITCHEN TO THE COUCH
Loading up on calories
Fatten up to sit
Refrigerator empty
Guts filled up with shit
Life on your back
Choking down fucking snacks

SHARON MICS
Bad breath and cold sore lips

WASTE MANAGEMENT
Shit tumbles onto paper plate

GERMINATION
Human spore

UNFORTUNATE FERTILITY
In and out
Nine months
A kid pops out

SCAT INFECTION
Chewing on turds
And chugging down piss
How do you not fucking die?

SLEEPING ON THE JOB
Face in the pillow
Ass in the air

INNOCENT WHILE EARNING
Blind eye to sex crimes while money's being made
Guilty when the cash runs out

PAINFUL TO PLAY
Twisted face
Grunts of pain
Popping vein
It's all for fucking show

NATURE WALK
Duck shit and dead fish and sunshine
You're better off inside

GRAVE OR FLAME
In da ground or reduced to ash

VISUALLY IMPAIRED UNDERWEAR
Wipe it
Sniff it
Wipe it
Smell it
Visually impaired underwear

CROTCH WARMER
Soft and moist and slightly warm
My pocket's hot
Got ruined on the way

NOSE HIGH TO THE BROWN EYE
Nose
Asshole
Nose high to the brown eye

MOUTHFUL OF MONEY
Couple dollars short
Pull out a couple of fucking teeth

WELL-WRITTEN KINDLING
Pen and paper
Gasoline and match
Cherished novel and tabloid rag
It all fucking burns the same

NO-PAY
No health today
Can't fucking pay

BAND-BREAKER
Drug bust
Hard time
Fuck

AIR THRASH
Hand cramps from my air guitar

AXE FUCK
(Cadaver Feast cover)

INTENTIONAL TOE
Hiking up the panties
Accentuate the beef
Camel toe

SHOEHORNED
Cramming in shit
And making it fit
To prove you can play
But it gets in the fucking way

ANCESTRY.COM
Descendants of kings
From royalty to poverty

PAINTED RELEASES
Painted disc
Looks like shit
Custom made
Can't be fucking played

BRUTAL BUYBACK
Rescued from racks
CDs bought back
Pennies on the dollar
Then given away

DEMOS ONLY
I like their old shit
Before they learned how to play

JERRY'S KIDS (BUT NOT HIS OWN)
Fuck off

DOG PECKER RED
Dog pecker red
Twist up the lipstick
Of raging hard dog pecker beef

VAGINICIDE / PENICIDE
Vaginicide
Penicide
You decide

INTRODUCTION TO SHIT
Building up to nothing
And now the song is fucking done

VEGETABLES CAN'T RUN
They don't bleed
They don't scream
And they don't taste very good, either

BOGUS TRACKS
Tack them on the end
They're a waste of time and usually suck

CANS AND CARDBOARD
Burdens of our planet
Are placed upon our backs
Recycle
I'm not cleaning up shit

FOLK ROCK FUCK
True calling as a hick
Go suck a fucking dick
Hillbilly on a bale
With an acoustic guitar
Folk rock fuck

INFECTION TRADJECTION
Plague grenades with feces-coated tips

THE GAPE TRAIN
Life is a series of unwashed bulls
Making emergency stops
Standing in line to fuck you in the ass

FAVORITE FRUIT
Out of the closet and on your TV
Hated in life, but loved on the screen
Who's your favorite fruit?

DUST COLLECTION
Buying shit
Placed on shelf
Now a chore to keep it fucking clean

HANDFAN
Cunt hole
Asshole
Mouth hole
No fuck

NAPCAR
Round and round
500 laps
Wake me up for the fucking crash

PORNOGRAPHIC MEMORY
Twat and tits
Give me fits
Pecker twist
Broken wrist